(Note: given the “gender fluidity” in today’s culture, and so that readers do not consider this writer gender-biased, I will say upfront that the ultimate test as to whether or not you should consider prostate massage is whether you actually have a prostate to begin with. Enough said.)
The really extraordinary thing about this short blog (how many times have you seen a writer apologize for getting directly to the point?) is that there should be no need for it. Every man (or prostate-owner) on the planet should already know this. But they don’t:
1. One of the first things doctors learn in medical school is that, if a man can live to a ripe old age with every other body organ in good shape, your prostate will find you and kill you anyway.
2. At the risk of oversimplifying, the prostate is a happy little organ living in a very inconvenient place. Like every other organ in your body, it can accumulate waste products from everyday bodily functions; and, also like every other organ, it can lose tone and become disease-prone if it is not exercised on a regular basis.
3. No, I did not mean THAT kind of exercise, although sex does help keep your prostate in fighting trim. I meant real exercise. Because of its placement, walking is the best exercise in the world for your prostate. Other exercises are good too (yoga, rebounding) but walking is a winner.
4. If you want that “extra” degree of protection, consider massage. No, you cannot massage your prostate with your own hand in spite of what the chat groups say. Unless you have monkey fingers that are preternaturally long. Only two ways to get a regular massage — from a doctor (or specialist). Or using a home device.
5. If you opt for a home device, the ones that resemble a small partially inflated balloon are intended to provide a “road trip” as well as a massage and are overkill. The long straight ones that look like monkey fingers are best.
6. And, of course, most men would rather have a root canal than discuss their prostate, yet alone attempt to communicate with it via a battery-operated appliance requires not only unusual placement beforehand, but extra cleaning afterwards. More’s the pity.